Men have been trying to understand the female species since
Eve teased poor ole Adam in the Garden of Eden. To this day, guys still see women as enigmatic creatures and have come no closer to understanding
chicks, and what they really want, need and desire of them. Perhaps we can provide a little insight into the mind of a woman for your future reference.
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We wish you luck on your quest to understanding the mind of women, and how it thinks about men in general.
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Women's Ultimate Fantasies Revealed
In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman's ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman's ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once.
While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.
Conversing with Women - Is it really Wise?
How to Speak About Women and Be Politically Correct
1. She is not a Babe or a Chick - She is a Breasted American.
2. She is not a Screamer or Moaner - She is Vocally Appreciative.
3. She is not Easy - She is Horizontally Accessible.
4. She does not Tease or Flirt - She engages in Artificial Stimulation.
5. She is not Dumb - She is a Detour Off The Information Superhighway.
6. She has not Been Around - She is a Previously Enjoyed Companion.
7. She does not Get You Excited - She causes Temporary Blood Displacement.
8. She is not Kinky - She is a Creative Caretaker.
9. She does not have a Killer Body - She is Terminally Attactive.
10. She is not an Airhead - She is Reality Impaired.
11. She does not get Drunk or Tipsy - She gets Chemically Inconvenienced.
12. She is not Horny - She is Sexually Focused.
13. She does not have Breast Implants - She is Medically Enhanced.
14. She does not Nag You - She becomes Verbally Repetitive.
15. She is not a Slut - She is Sexually Extroverted.
16. She does not have Major League Hooters - She is Pectorally Superior.
17. She is not a Two Bit Whore - She is a Low Cost Provider.
It's All About Reading Emotions
Her side of the story?
My husband was in an odd mood Saturday night. We planned to meet at a cafe for a drink. I spent the afternoon shopping with the girls and I thought it might have been my fault because I was a bit later than I promised but he didn't say anything about it. I don't remember doing anything to make him upset, but I could tell there was something wrong.
The conversation was quite slow going so I thought we should go off to someplace intimate so we could talk more privately. We went to this restaurant and he was STILL acting a bit funny. I was getting really worried, what did I do? What was bothering him? Was he mad at me?
I tried to cheer him up, but started to wonder what was bothering him. Was it me or something else? I asked him if he was upset with me, he said no. But I wasn't really sure. In the car on the way back home, I said that I loved him deeply and he just put his arm around me. I didn't know what the heck that meant because, you know, he didn't say it back or anything. We finally got back home and I was wondering if he was going to leave me! So I tried to get him to talk but he just switched on the TV.
Reluctantly, I said I was going to go to bed. Then after about 10 minutes, he joined me and to my surprise, we made love. But, he still seemed really distracted, so afterwards I wanted to confront him but didn't, so I just cried myself to sleep. I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, I really think he's seeing someone else.
His side of the story:
Played quite bad today --- shot 97 - - -can't putt for shit! Felt kind of tired.
Got laid though. Time for a nap.
The Difference between a Good Girl and a Bad Girl
Good girls say "thanks for a wonderful dinner"...
Bad girls say, "what's for breakfast?"
Good girls never go after another girl's man...
Bad girls go after him AND his brother.
Good girls wear white cotton panties...
Bad girls don't wear any.
Good girls wax their floors...
Bad girls wax their bikini lines.
Good girls loosen a few buttons when it's hot...
Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons.
Good girls make chicken for dinner...
Bad girls make reservations.
Good girls blush during bedrooms scenes in movies...
Bad girls know they could do better.
Good girls never consider sleeping with the boss...
Bad girls never do either, unless he's very, very rich.
Good girls believe you're not fully dressed without a strand of pearls...
Bad girls believe that you are fully dressed with JUST a strand of pearls.
Good girls love italian food...
Bad girls love italian waiters.
Understanding the Moods of a Woman
Women are angels of truth and a dream of fiction,
A woman is a bundle of contradiction,
She's afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,
But will tackle her boyfriend alone in the house.
Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose,
She'll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose,
She'll win you in range, enchant you in silk,
She'll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk;
At times she'll be vengeful, merry and sad,
She'll hate you like poison, and love you like mad.
Compared to the Moods of a Man
Um, Horny.
Spice Up Your Sex Life! fun kinky fetish toys
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Weird And Funky Spunky Wild Sex Facts
So, You Want Her To Swallow?
Semen tastes sweeter if you haven't been eating meat. It's also an old wives tale that eating pineapple makes it taste really good.
An Amazing Organ… The vagina is self-cleaning, kind of like the oven. Is that were the term "one in the oven" comes from?.
Production Far Exceeds Demand…
A healthy male's ejaculate contains over 200 million sperm. If every one of these were able to find an egg, the average guy could easily fertilize 5 billion eggs in less than two weeks (this would double the current population of the earth).
Of course, the time required would vary slightly between individuals and be affected by environmental factors like diet and the availability of porn.
The Best Cure For A Headache…
A female orgasm releases endorphins (chemicals released in the brain that give us pleasure) and these are powerful painkillers.
Having a headache is a reason to have sex, not to abstain from it.
So You Think You're The Father…
The more recent Kinsey studies that included genetic testing found one in ten children in America is mistaken about their father's identity.
Also, a British study found that a woman is more likely to become pregnant with a lover rather than her husband, when she's been having sex with both in a given time period and even having sex with her husband more often.
How Many Of Us Are Cheaters?
The results of sex polls are generally inconsistent, but the range of inconsistency on infidelity questionnaires is especially high.
The results of the various Kinsey polls over the last 50 years asking if a person has committed at least one act of extramarital sex have revealed numbers as low as 15% and as high as 65% - and are as inconsistent in the 1950's as they are in the 1990's.
Most Polls show a higher percentage of male infidelity, but some reveal an even percentage, suggesting women are just as likely to cheat.
One thing is certain- there are a lot of liars and unfaithful spouses out there.
Is It As Long As A Baby's Arm?
The average erect penis is six inches in length, although flaccid measurements vary considerably.
The New Way To Hook Up and Fall in Love…
Computers have made it easier to get laid. There is an Internet dating site, boasting over 10 million registered members. Currently 18,000 new people a day join to find someone for a casual affair.
Tips To Last Longer In Bed
Are you tired of being grilled with questions like, "is that it? Are you done?" Good sex is not all about how long you can last, but racing to the finish line is the number one complaint women have about their men. Here are a few tips that can turn any minuteman into a marathon lover.
Get To Know Yourself
Practice makes perfect. If you masturbate concentrating on prolonging your orgasm you will be able to repeat the performance in bed. Whack off as long as you can, as often as you can. Bring yourself as close to orgasm and stop just long enough that you can start all over again and bring yourself back to the same level of ecstasy, then start all over again.
Make a game of seeing how many times as you can bring yourself to the edge without coming and pay attention to the signs and sensations your body gives you that you're about to come. It's possible to train yourself to withhold an orgasm at will, using this method alone.
Foreplay Is A Good Thing
Even though it doesn't really help you to last longer, it can seem like you have lasted longer if you spend more time on foreplay- with her. Make sure that you have touched every square inch of her body before you even lick her pussy. Extend foreplay to the point of driving you both crazy. She'll be a lot more appreciative, even if you do only make it thirty seconds in her pussy.
Be careful about receiving too much foreplay yourself. Every stimulation your cock receives is a queue to get ready to cum, but only in a constant timeline. If it's possible, get her to give you head before you practice your foreplay skills on her. That way you'll have had a little break before she's begging for your cock.
The Best Positions
Everyone has different preferences for positions. There are some that you know will make you come fast and others that seem to just keep you hard. Choose positions that you know aren't your favorite first and when you are finally ready to cum (or just about exhausted) switch to your favorite.
Most men cum quicker doggy style but last longer with missionary and sex lying down on one side (spoon like). Cowgirl style is 50/50- it's strictly a personal preference. Some guys last longer when the woman is on top, some blow their wad as soon as she settles into the saddle.
Condoms Are Your Friend
Despite all the hype and the advertising claims about increased sensitivity, nothing cuts the sensation of sex more than a condom. If you still have trouble coming too fast with one on, wear two. But always remember
to put ono the jacket. You never know what you could catch.
Stay Focused Danielson
Don't let self-fulfilling prophecies work against you, make them work for you.
Remember, sexual stimulation is entirely in your mind. It might be hard to think so when a hot chick is riding you like a bronco, but it's true. You don't have to think about baseball or your grandmother naked (although those both work), but concentrating on not having an orgasm too soon does work, just stay focused. It has to do with the complex relationship our conscious mind has with our unconscious mind.
If you truly convince yourself that you aren't going to cum, you won't. It also works in reverse, so be careful- if you think you're going to cum too soon, you will.
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