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Defining "FREE" Adult Personal Ads - I'm a firm believer in online personal ads, and found my true love via Internet dating sites, but remember the confusion and frustration of clicking on sites claiming Totally Free Personal Ads only to find out that wasn't the case. For the most part, the majority of sites claim Free Memberships when marketing which can also be misconstrued as meaning that all site features are free. To make it clear, let's define the industry standards of the word "Free" being used.

• Free Adult Personal Ads - Typically means that it's free to join, place personal profiles, and free to search the ads. However, different sites require various paid upgrades to use advanced site features such as chatrooms and sending messages.
  
  
• Free Adult Dating Site Trial - Usually means that singles can join the site with no restrictions using all site functions for a predetermined amount of time. Your profile can remain in the database, but your downgraded to basic memberships after the trial.
  
  
• Totally Free Adult Personal Ads - "Should" mean that all site features are available to all singles with no restrictions, no registration, (to grab that email), and no limits on sending messages. All of the above listed free personals sites meet this definition.

Creativity counts. A personal ad can take many forms. A poem, perhaps. One amazing ad consisted entirely of titles -- one right after another -- of popular movies, carefully chosen and arranged to describe the ad placer.

Show them what YOU would want to know. Make a list of the most important things that you would like to know about a person before responding to an ad. Chances are, others would like to know the same about you. If you work, in what field? Have you ever been married before? Do you have children? Are you looking to make some new friends, or do you want find one special person to settle down with for a lifetime? Keep in mind that common goals are often more important in a relationship than individual interests.

Age isn't everything, but.... it is where a lot of people start. Be sure to include your age in the ad. If you don't want to give your exact age, narrow the range: "early twenties" or "mid forties" for example. If you are fifty but feel thirty,why not say so? If you are looking for someone outside your age range, give a range for the person you seek as well. Keep in mind that some people will be suspicious of a range that seems too wide - such as "twenty to sixty" - and this may limit responses. Likewise, a range too narrow (one to two years) also seems odd. Even those who fall in the narrow range might be hesitant to respond. Stating your age, and avoiding ranges altogether, is generally the best approach.

Describe yourself first. Be careful to avoid creating a personal ad that is simply a mile-long list of characteristics you seek in another, without saying much about yourself. It's better to let the person reading the ad decide if they might be a match. This does not mean that you shouldn't say anything about what you're looking for, just don't overdo it. You don't want to be too picky.

Details, details. How many times have you read a personal ad that states: I enjoy movies, music, and going out.? This sentence describes millions of people! The idea is to make yourself stand out from the rest! Instead, name a recent movie that you enjoyed. List some of your favorite music styles, song titles, or artists. If you enjoy going out to Italian restaurants, or line-dancing at a country bar on Saturday nights, say so! Ironically, it is the very details that are often overlooked as being insignificant or boring which in fact add the color and depth necessary for a personal ad to be truly effective.

Honesty is the best policy. Above all, be honest when describing yourself. No matter who you are, or what kind of person you are looking for, you have a better chance of finding that person - and with less disappointment along the way - if you are honest from the beginning. Online dating services are fun places to meet new people, and the friends you'll meet online can be the most loving you'll ever know. Chatting online or through email is safe, but meeting someone in person that you've met on the net for the first time needs a bit of common sense.

1.  Use your instincts. We know you want to trust everyone and believe everything they say, especially when they're saying what you want to hear. If it's too good to be true, it sometimes is. More often than not, the person you've met online is just the same in person, but take your time to get to know her/him/them.

2.  Remain anonymous. Until you know that the person or persons you're interested in are the sort you want to meet, remain anonymous. Most online dating services allow you to use a nickname and send mail using only the nickname and your dating service address. Don't be pressured to "send mail to my private email" because you'll be giving our your personal details in your return address.

3.  Remain wary. Don't believe everything you see on screen. If you have any doubts, ask questions. If there is even the slightest bit of doubt, move on. There are SO many people out there that could make you happy, so don't take a chance.

4.  Don't be pushed! If you're not ready to meet someone, don't be coerced into it. You'll be upset and you might be putting yourself at risk. So what if you're accused of "not being real", at least you'll feel good until you ARE ready to meet in person.

5.  Spend time online. If you're not 100% certain this person is for real, spend time online chatting or chat through email until you're sure.

6.  Talk on the phone. You can learn a lot about someone by talking over the phone. To ensure your anonymity, give a mobile phone number or use a pay phone. If you hear anything that gives you doubts, don't meet.

7.  Photos. It's true that a picture is worth 1000 words. It doesn't tell the whole story, but you can tell whether you're physically attracted to this person. If the photo looks too good to be true, ask for a photo to be taken somewhere you suggest. If it can't be done, it might not be their photo!

8.  Personality flaws. If your new friend displays controlling behavior (needs to know where you are, is unhappy when you do things away from the computer), shows anger or anything else that makes you feel uncomfortable, then this person is not going to make you happy. If you're an outgoing, friendly man, a clinging, dependent woman will drive you up the wall.

9.  Be safe. When you decide to meet for the first time, tell someone where you're going. Take your own car, public transportation or ask a friend to take you and pick you up. These security measures won't last forever and if he or she is put off by them, then tell them to find someone else. There is never going to be only one person that you must have in order to be happy.

10.  Always be alert. Safety precautions are not only for meeting new friends from the Internet. These guidelines are good ideas whether you're meeting someone you've met at a concert, in a pub or at the grocery store. Just be careful out there.

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